repentance

Tonight marks the holiest day of the year, Yom Kippur. We reflect on the past year and the sins we have committed. A sin can be a big one or a small one. It’s a chance for Jews to repent and improve their relationship with God. And we hope for a “Gmar Chativah Tovah”, to be sealed in the “Book of Life”.

For me it’s a “fake it til you make it” relationship with G-d. I can exercise that faith “muscle” by reading more and praying more, but is He walking with me? Where do I fit in this great “Book of Life” that hovers over me? Is my “neshama” or soul ignoring His signs?

I am not angry at G-d for giving me cancer and I know it’s a miracle I’ve outlived dire predictions, so I must remember that a little bit of Him is in every nurse and doctor who cares for me.

In spite of my physical and mental struggles I can acknowledge the many wrongs I have committed.. That will forge a deeper awareness.

My biggest “wrong” is my mouth speaks before my brain sends the message! Oy and vey!

So I will close my mouth and thoughtfully write more blog posts!

To my Jewish friends and family, may you have an easy fast and feel redeemed for the year 5786!